I'm not done yet!

Sorry I have been MIA this week....it's been a really terrible week to the point that I knew if I blogged about it, I would regret it- because I don't keep this private.  That's all I'm going to say about that...

So now that I just finished a great 5 miles on the 'mill, I can handle writing something positive on here and not be the depressed, miserable version of Colleen that I have been all week.  I'm really trying to break out of this funk and my weigh in last night should have done that....but it only did momentarily until I got a good runners high today.   Whoever said endorphins aren't fantastic obviously know diddly crap.

DUH!

Speaking of my weigh in....the nice thing about losing as much weight as I have is that no matter where you go people freak out and are inspired.  It's humbling, embarrassing, and exciting all at the same time.  I'm so grateful for weight watchers, I can't even fully express how much it has changed my life.  O wait....before and after pictures, take a look and you'll have an idea.  But it's so much more than just how I look, it's how I feel physically and emotionally.  This week I hit another MAJOR milestone- I have now lost 250 LBS TOTAL!  To be precise, 251.6 lbs!!!  To hit my ideal goal weight, I only have 23.4 lbs left.  HOLY CRAP!!  Very exciting indeedy!  My doctor goal is only 3.4 lbs away, but as my doctor and I discussed, I'm going to let my body decide where it feels happy, and it's telling me closer to 160, not 180.   Also met a potential new running friend at the meeting, and we run the same pace (by some miracle)!  I'm hoping we can run together sometime, it would be so nice having a running partner, especially for long runs. 

I've also been really trying to cross train more after my week of high mileage that was immediately followed by shin pain.  That's meant more time on the combo-elliptical and strength training which is great and would make Emily happy, lol.  O how I miss Gettysburg and the Y....I guess I really miss my routine there and my safe zones.  Sometimes it's good to get outside your comfort zone and test your limits.

Like when you start getting people that tell you "you're getting so skinny, you aren't going to lose anymore, right?"  When people say this it makes me feel two conflicting thoughts at once: 1. Me?! Skinny?! AWESOME?!  2.  Don't say that, I am SO not skinny and can't handle those thoughts.

Really number 2 is the scary part- it places this little seed in my head that I am good where I am.  But I am NOT.  First off, yes I am much healthier and thinner than I was, but skinny? Who are you kidding?!  Colleen will never be skinny.  Fit, HECK YES!  But skinny? NO!! I am muscular and curvy and very happy with both of those facts.   While I would love it if I could shrink my trunk-like thighs and get rid of my extra skin pretty much everywhere, that's not going to happen, let's face reality.

So friends and family- please help me out and don't tell me to stop losing, it messes with my head.  I am not at my goal weight yet- trust me, you will know when I get there because I will be FREAKING OUT and there WILL be a big party!  <3