I had a great Saturday, with some absolutely beautiful weather! I went for a hike with Tanya at Fair Hill and then she came over to the farm and met the horses and we played with my dad's trains. It's funny how something I used to hate so much as a kid, I find so fun now. It was great to just hang out, catch up and be able to do it all outside at one of my favorite places in the world.
Here are some pictures from the day, courtesy of Tanya's camera phone. You can check out more of her awesome photo skills here! She did a photo shoot of my husband and I a year ago and actually made me feel comfortable throughout which was impressive.
So, a great start to the weekend! After the hike I did a boss job of relaxing with my feet up and watching a couple movies while Adrian was off at his friend's party.
So then I woke up this morning at 6am in sheer terror that I was late to a race.....Which of course would have been the case had I not been forced to pull out of this year's target race- the Philadelphia Rock 'n Roll Half Marathon. So after realizing I wasn't indeed late because I could NOT run I felt that sense of disappointment and loss again. No more tears were shed but I just felt....down. It's been 73 days without a run. That just....sucks. I am obviously no stranger to injuries, my twin elbow surgeries can attest to that. I feel like for the most part I can deal with it, but sometimes it just gets to me. I had quite a few friends run the race today, which was part of what I was really excited about- running with friends.
At least I know that I am moving in the right, healing direction. I'm back to strength training, biking, and starting to walk longer distances again as I work on building up time on my feet. In a couple weeks I hope to start building in some running and working through a couch to 5k program to build my mileage back up.
Sometimes I just want to stomp my feet, throw a temper tantrum and just get out and run! Instead, I will remember this:
I have a rental car right now because of a minor fender bender almost 2 months ago. It was the other driver's fault and his insurance is covering the damages. So, I finally dropped off my beloved Chase (aka my Honda Civic) this morning to get it all pretty again and have a functional trunk back. I have a silver Kia something or other that luckily has satellite radio. I love the alt nation station!
I had my first OT (occupational therapy) appointment after my left elbow surgery today. I have this weird love/hate feeling towards therapy because since I've been to NRH so much they are like family, however being there means I'm injured. It went well,and it also kinda hurt like a monster....which was what I was expecting. It will be interesting to see how the measurements will differ from my right elbow, if they will, as the swelling goes down and as my range of motion improves. It was so exciting when my right arm hit that zero angle (aka straight!) for the first time, and I am hopefully that will happen as well with my left elbow.
Last but certainly not least...as per Dr. Kindschi's (my sports med doctor) I went to a podiatrist that specializes in sports related injuries- specifically running. He was humbling...a tiny bit of sugar coated on the brutal truth....and I'm so grateful. These items were a bit hard to swallow yet necessary:
1. This injury is because I switched to a minimalist shoe....
Hello Merrell Dash Glove
2. That is because I weigh too much to wear a minimalist shoe without resulting in the exact foot injury I am plagued with, and that he sees all the time. Apparently the average weight that would be appropriate for a woman to wear these shoes is 110-120 lbs. Really?
my thoughts exactly
Yeah...so that was a bit of a harsh pill to swallow, however it's a little reassuring that there aren't many women that would even fit that category
3. So I need to stick with these shoes that I was wearing before that give me stability. According to him these are mid-range shoes, as he doesn't think I need motion support shoe, just a stability shoe. O yeah, with these cool super feet inserts in them.
Welcome back Asics 2170
4. And I will be gradually building up over a ridiculously long time to get to long mileage again.... Also I will be doing ample stretching, strength training, and yoga. With a good dose of cross training thrown in.
My mission is to be extremely slow with building back up my fitness, hone a good strength training program with lots of focus on core, stretch a lot, and throw some yoga in there for good measure. Luckily I have support to help me, and some time to find the perfect shoe.
Ok, enough house talk for a while, sorry if I bored you guys with all that! It's been a really exciting couple months house hunting, then buying, and now all the work on the house itself. I can't help but be consumed by it all!
It's starting to settle down a bit now that we are unpacking and most of our furniture has arrived. We have some little projects left but as many people suggested- we need to remember to take baby steps! It's hard to remember to take things slow when all I want to do is get everything done immediately.
This week has been a good workout week. I've been alternating between elliptical and running for cardio, and my legs and lungs seem to like the variation. I'm working on building up my mileage while wearing my Marrell Dash Gloves, which means my calves are super tight and I've been focusing on recovery almost as much as running. As I've learned over this journey, when I take things out of my routine that I know are important, like recovery, I quickly regret it. I've been stretching not just at the end of my workout like usual but also after a quick warm up, which I hope will help with. I've also been adding in my three favorite/hated recovery tools:
Foam Roller
Massage Stick
Rumble Roller
I've been using both my high density foam roller and the rumble roller on different areas. My IT bands can't quite handle the rumble yet- I'm working my way up to it, so I have been also including the massage stick on that area, and both the front and back of my calves. But, my glutes- they LOVE the rumble. I have been quite careful about foam rolling, though, because many of the rolling moves require me to hold myself up by my arms- which of course is challenging and can be painful. Hence the extra massage sticking I have been doing for certain areas. But, my glutes can never get enough foam/rumble rolling, they are always tight and in knots.
I also need to figure out a better schedule, that I can stick to consistently, concerning my strength training. I've been trying to fit it in more, but it's been about once a week instead of the preferred 2-3 times a week. I know how important it is for not just my fitness, but my running training and ability to keep injuries at bay. I will make it happen!
Tuesday was my tennis elbow surgery... therefore I am writing this entry with only my left hand- talk about dedication. Or perhaps boredom, lol.
First off, I am forever grateful to my mom who was there with me every step of the way. She came Monday night for dinner and stayed over night to take me to the hospital in the morning. She was wonderful throughout all the waiting...which was substantial. When I scheduled the surgery- they said it was an 11:00am surgery and to be there at 9:00am. We got there and checked in right at 9....and I didn't even start getting prepped for surgery until 11:15. Then more waiting...
But in the end of course it all worked out! I remember all the joking around in the surgery suite and all the prep, then I was waking up and they were asking me questions. The pain was the sharpest right after waking up and they kept pumping me up with meds until my pain was a 5 (0-10 scale). The entire staff was funny and kind, and I felt like they all cared for me as a person. I was at Union Memorial Hospital, which is the same place that I go for my sports med doctor and of course the Curtis National Hand Center where I see Dr. Segalman, the surgeon who worked on my elbow.
Before the surgery, Dr. Segalman came in to cover what he was doing- which was de-breeing the area and shaving down the bone (sounds scary!!) so the tendon could reconnect. We also talked about my left elbow pain and he suggested having marcaine (think novacain) mixed with my own blood injected into my elbow. We went for it- and holy cow is there a MEGA bruise there- hence the reason why I've been icing both arms.
I wrote most of this entry in many small stints yesterday and then some more today and am having a hard time finishing being so painful and drowsy..... so enjoy a visual of this huge soft cast and icing my other arm while I get some more meds...
Want a fast way to make a kitten act like an idiot?
exhibit A
O such an innocent little thing, the foam roller- it is like a medieval torture device and my best friend rolled into one. It hurts so good and I needed it badly on Tuesday after my work meeting. The meeting went pretty well but I was in heels all day and my legs were complaining about it by the end.
I gotta say...I've been enjoying physical therapy. Everything they say makes so much sense and I am not only seeing but feeling the difference in how my legs, abs, and back feel. My what was feeling like constant lower back pain has improved so much- it's only occasional now and I have some methods to help it.
Like this
It's also intriguing how lately people feel the need to give me lots of advice on how to magically help me with my flared tennis elbow. Over the past 1+ year of dealing with this tennis elbow I assure you I have read everything I can. Just because you read something on the internet doens't mean you are an expert on recovery of an injury. yeargghh!! /end rant
So yeah...I guess you figured out my tennis elbow is flaring again. SIGH. After a long discussion with my physical therapist to try to see if there was a trigger that casued it to come back, she identified a possible issue being moving from my full body strength training to a more machine based workout I've been doing with Upinder. Hmmm....so lifting heavy is supposed to be the "cure all" for tennis elbow, huh? Yeargh, yeah no. Well, I haven't been lifting heavy as a friend told me I MUST do because supposedly it is the only way to fix my injury (BULL CRAP). But, I have been lifting on mostly machines which I've never focused on before and don't really like. Initially it was feeling better and not causing any pain but Barb thinks moving away from full body movements could have further inhibited my progress in healing. She's suggesting seeing the sports med doc again and getting MRIs of both elbows. We will see....
Have you ever struggled with a sports injury? What injury was it and how did you deal with it?
Wow....I've missed writing lately, and I've made every excuse in the book as to why I didn't want to, couldn't, shouldn't, etc. nnn
So....the shouldn't part I will explain as best I can because I feel that is a legitimate reason why I havne't posted. Work has been very....stressful to say the least the past 3 weeks, especially the past 2 weeks or so. Heck lets be honest- work has been stressful this entire year. The stress has varied from normal work stress to extreme levels and back down again. I don't feel comfortable talking about it due to the public nature of this blog but needless to say- I needed to stay away from my blog for a while when I was in the RAAARRR I want to scream stage of my stress so I didn't post something I would regret.
Angry kitty!
Yeah, I didn't want to turn into that monstrosity, sorry. So I was smart and just kept reading all my favorite blogs but dind't post in fear of writing something I would regret or starting a binging spiral. It's odd how the majority of the time writing is very therapeutic, but sometimes you don't want to get the words out there because they make you face reality.
Well, one reality I have been facing lately is not being able to run. It's sucked, but my body must have really needed it because it's responding well to the physical therapy. My physical therapists have me doing a lot of stretches, long held yoga poses, and some strengthening work involving my legs and especially my core. It's very humbling to find out you are basically a weakling and have crappy core strength even given all the work I have put in to both areas. Humbling and frustrating.
The PTs have been giving me some running time at the end of my physical therapy sessions and it's not surprising how unsettling it is to run under scrutiny. Although, having said that- it has been helping . On Friday Mark had me running on the treadmill for an entire 10 minutes. Yeah...very short time but that was a build up from my first run with them at 3 minutes. The run on Friday felt good, like really darn good. I'm working on so many things associated with my form sometimes it's really hard to keep it all in mind when I'm running. But, if I just focus on my forward lean and cadence the rest seems to kind of fall into place.
So...that's all for now. I'm sorry for my crappy posting lately- Hopefully I can find the motivation soon.
Ugggh. Today has been both good and bad. Mainly good with a bad end.
I'll start with the bad first because that's how I'm feeling after another night of needless eating. Not the same as last night- mainly my choices were good and they were because I was actually hungry. Then I wasted 10 points on 3 little desserts. STUPID! But....delicious. So as Joan suggested to me earlier (thanks Joan) you need to forgive yourself. It happened, now I need to move on. And not do it again tomorrow!!
The big deal that happened today was I had another physical therapy appointment. On Monday I met with Mark and had my initial evaluation. He was nice and gave me lots of hip rotator stretches, hamstring, and even some lower leg stretches. He suggested trying some more elliptical to gauge how I felt and asked me to bring in my running shoes to my next appointment. Mark's a triathlete (cool!) and was excited about all the activities I was doing and that I was a swimmer- which he said is the best workout I can get right now. Given my goal of being able to run with no pain- he suggested I spend some time with Barb as well, who is a long distance runner and works a lot with runners and improving form.
Which was today, with Barb. She was AWESOME. Plain and simple, she was simply fantastic. After a quick review with me and my chart- she immediately wanted to see my running shoes and already was telling me what my form was like and how my food landed before she even saw me stand. She eventually had me run on the treadmill since I was having no pain. She recorded me from behind and from the side on her iPad while I ran (slowly) on the treadmill. Initially running wasn't painful but it quickly became more and more uncomfortable so I was glad when she asked me to stop after only a couple minutes. Then we sat down and she explained what she saw.
Bad heel striker!
All in all....I am a complete running disaster. I do pretty much everything wrong. I heel strike, I have very hard and loud foot falls, slow cadence, I don't pick up my feet enough....and that's the initial impression. My posture is too rigid and I have such side dominance that I turn my torso more on one side than the other. My right shoulder rotates more than my left- looking like I'm trying to pull my left side along behind me. And my left hip is too tight which isn't allowing me to get a fast enough turnover on that side, making my right side work twice as hard. In fact, my whole left side of my body is just plain stiff and not as flexible as my right. Also I overpronate- which looks even worse in slow motion. Heck, I overpronate when I walk so this is nothing new. O yeah, and I have zero forward lean.
As I sat next to her listening to her massacre my form (in a nice way, explaining along the way what it should look and feel like) I felt this odd combination of relief and embarrassment. Relief because this is something concrete we could work on. Embarrassment because here I thought my form was good- or so I've been told by others (until Rick Meyers' clinic that is. Apparently he knows what he's talking about lol) and apparently this whole time I've been a complete running disaster.
She said we have two paths we could go down:
1. Work towards a goal race and get me pain free- basically fix the immediate problem and send me on my way. She said if we do this it is very likely the problem will reoccur if I continue to run long distances- but I could keep at running less that 6 miles or so with this form long term with minimal repeats of the same type of injury. But add in building up to half and full marathons and the injury WILL return.
2. Take significantly more time NOW to rewire my entire running form from top to bottom. It will take longer, but once my form is good, I shouldn't have issues running much longer distances giving my overall fitness level if I train properly.
DUH, option 2!! There really is no option 1 is what I told her. She replied with a "that's exactly what I was hoping to hear."
So, I have a very long and tedious road ahead of me that she said will be very challenging and frustrating, but Mark and her will be there every uncomfortable step along the way. It WILL be worth it, for sure! The immediate plan is lots of stretching and strengthening of my hips- especially my left hip. After much manipulating and prodding of my hamstrings, glutes, and hips- the left hip really leaped out as the main problem. Interesting how these things happen! She seems concerned about possible bursitis- so she is confirming with my doctor that the hip x-rays showed the left hip clearly enough to rule it out in my left hip. My doctor was initially focusing on the right hip, so I'm really not sure...
Friday my doctor finally gave me the green light on my elbows. Meaning I can gently ease back into normal activity, including repetitive motion!
Aka- UPPER BODY LIFTING!!
Yeah....not so much- it's gonna take a long time to get back to where I was and even longer after that to have diamonds of gold....like perhaps skin removal surgery. Before I move back to my current topic, I've realized lately that I don't think I can avoid not having skin removal in certain areas and still be the level of athlete I want to be. Chafing is a monster with red pointy horns that won't leave you alone when you have more skin than you should. Extra skin that not only looks gross but gets in the way when you are busting your butt.
So, I lifted with Emily today which made me all giddy like a kid with a new toy- trying all different kinds of moves and positions to see how my arms would take it. Lots of fun! It's crazy how much more difficult a squat or lunge is with some weight in your hands. It's honestly been so long I forgot. Even if it was only a combined 8 lbs. Yeah....4 lb dumbbells make me want to cry in frustration BUT you have to walk before you run. I need to be SUPER careful not to flare this injury up which will probably make me mega paranoid about every thing my muscles tell me.
