Friday, February 7, 2014

Interesting morning....

I'm sitting in the BWI airport right now waiting for a flight and I just had a totally bizarre experience...

Suddenly I began experiencing some of the worst stomach cramps I've had since before being on Prilosec. (It's an amazing drug)  I immediately start rewinding my morning in my head and start frantically thinking- did I take it this morning?  Most definitely.  My routine with taking Prilosec then brushing my teeth is as solid as my habit of eating breakfast every day.  Aka- nearly flawless.  So, my mind is racing as I double over and try to give my stomach some relief.  It's cramping so bad my back hurts.

A couple minutes later, as abruptly as this bizarre spell came on me, it dissipated.  I look around in a bit of a daze and realized with a start that the person sitting right next to me eating a fast food breakfast sandwich had walked away.  I hardly noticed her sitting there eating it, but when she got up to leave it was a reminder that she had been eating one of my old standby breakfast feasts.  My brain had registered that for a split second when she sad down and I had immediately dismissed it.  Apparently my stomach didn't dismiss it and wanted to starkly remind me that it wanted NONE of that crap.  I heard you loud and clear- thanks!

Say no to fast food!

As I sit here pondering what just happened, I'm realizing how startling different my life is than it was just 4.5 years ago, before starting weight watchers.  This past October marked my 4 year anniversary with weight watchers. Wow.  That is absolutely incredible to me sometimes.  Just 5 years ago, I was a depressed, morbidly obese, desperate shell of a person.  I was going through the motions of my life, sitting in the backseat and watching it go by.

Now I'm the pilot. I'm in control of my destiny- and I'm loving life. 5 years ago if I had a flight delay I would be like that woman that just stood up- I would be eating fast food and inwardly dreading the nightmare that was about to face me on the plane.  If I was still 400 lbs I would be sweating nervous buckets of sweat waiting for the inevitable humiliation that IS flying when you are morbidly obese.  The pain of the seats, the emotional anguish and embarrassment of having to use a seat belt extender.  And that terrible discomfort of sitting next to a stranger that wishes there was any other seat on the plane to sit in, but beside you.

Now people want to sit next to me on planes.  Women talk with me comfortably, with plenty of space for themselves.  Men hit on me.  I once had a young man chose a middle seat next to me when there was plenty of other seats available, including a window seat nearby.  I was really But I was polite, and chatted back with him for the majority of the 3 hour flight to Chicago (I think it was Chicago? lol).  He told me as we were leaving the plane that he had seen me in line and had to try to sit near to me because my face was mesmerizing and he wanted to see if my personality matched.  He said it did and then asked for my number.  Wow.

Last night I was having a blast trying on all different combinations of dresses, shoes, and jewelry to match to figure out exactly what to pack for this week.  I have a closet full of size 10 clothes that fit me.  Even some 8s in there. Never could I have imagined 5 years ago that I would be here.  And I've been here for over a year!

I'm so grateful for this new life I've made for myself. And proud of myself. I DID THIS!

What are you proud of?